PDF/EPUB Carnageland


  • Paperback
  • 67
  • Carnageland
  • David W. Barbee
  • English
  • 15 September 2020
  • 9781933929958

David W. Barbee » 5 Read & Download

Read & Download Carnageland ç PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free David W. Barbee » 5 Read & Download Download ↠ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free » David W. Barbee Se he's stranded with millions of fairy tale whores pornographic fables and magical hermaphrodites Armed only with his Doomshooter and the strange singing trumpet betwixt his legs 898 must complete his mission while resisting t. Id says3 2 1 BLAST OFF Oh shit me straight to hell the Invaders are coming Look out fairy tale creatures 898 has left his Inpire Inc piggy bank homeworld and has one and only one thing on his bulbous mind ConuestNo amount of cold hard cash growing on your crystalline trees is going to stop this fucker and his Doomshooter as it melts faces off fauns and shoots grenades into mountainous orgy piles of peopleWho s gonna stop him Maybe the Se7en Dwarves armed to the teeth with jewel encrusted weapons Or perhaps the mysterious Wizches who rule over this planet will have something to say when they see the havoc 898 creates as he enacts his genocide over this soon to be new acuisition for the InpireOf course this all depends on if our little invading friend can keep that singing trumpet tucked in his pants and stay true to his missionLittle Green Man why does your determination turn me on soEgo saysUpon completing the first few chapters of Carnageland I uickly discerned most of the characters save for the protagonist Invader 898 were not going to be too greatly developed and I was delighted by this realization This is after all a book about carnage and I wouldn t be able to enjoy my carnage without widespread death and dismembermentThe characters of this world I recognized as Bizarro versions of their fairy tale counterparts From fauns and gremlins to the Three Bears and soldier playing cards the whole gamut of fantasyland people are coveredOf note to me was the Captain sailing on a ship of gold and scouring the seas for mermaids to sell into slavery While he shared only two chapters with this reader his role was vitally important to understanding the way this particular world spinsOne of my favorite ideas contained in this book are the hermaphroditic magicians aptly known as Wizches Self proclaimed rulers of the planet they have even gone so far as to maintain a special school used to train young Wizches into future leaders They serve as the chief antagonists standing in the way of Invader 898Which brings me to the protagonist of Carnageland a character with a clearly defined goals who literally stops for nothing to achieve them If I could give out a New Bizarro Author Series award for Most Well Developed Character of 2009 it would go to Invader 898 This walking apocalypse is a Zim on acid His entire being was molded and conditioned from birth to invade invade invade 898 s faith in invasion is stronger than any Zionist jihadist and Fred Phelp s respective faiths combined and he uses this vigor to push himself forward in his uest to conuer alien worldsSuper Ego saysAt sixty seven pages long this is the shortest of the four NBAS books but it packs a lot of story into those pages The length is perfect this is a lean point A to point B to point Cetc read that never lets up from page oneThe story although in third person narrative doesn t stray from Invader 898 s point of view We experience the action and events as he sees them This does not however prevent the author from describing the world that 898 is experiencing and it stands as one of the enjoyable aspects of the story The landscapes the buildings the creatures all described beautifully and in as few words as necessary keeping up with the pace of the action while dazzling the reader with thoughts of a truly fantastic settingThere exists an extreme juxtaposition between Invader 898 and the alien world he invades This creates the main conflict in the story for the protagonist Like any good priest or politician 898 has vowed all his life to suppress his sexual tendencies And like priests and politicians he is constantly tempted by little altar boys and hookers in the form of fairy tale creatures who have turned sex into the greatest resource on their planet Ironically the planet they inhabit is made up entirely of what most other beings would consider to be of much greater value They have crystal for ground cash for leaves and oil for waterThe book alludes to several fairy tale creatures along with several fairy tales themselves From Grimm s Fairy Tales and Hans Christian Andersen to modern fantasies such as The Chronicles of Narnia and Harry Potter David W Barbee skews and sexualizes everybody s favorite children stories into Bizarro madnessThis is a modern fairy tale complete with a moral to be found hidden under the layers of carnage If Invader 898 is to completely conuer this world he must above all else conuer the last thing he ever thought he d have to himself The Hunt for the Golden Mole your determination turn me on soEgo saysUpon completing the first few chapters of Carnageland I uickly discerned most of the characters save for the protagonist Invader 898 were not going to be too greatly developed and I was delighted by this realization This is after all a book about carnage and I wouldn t be able to enjoy my carnage without widespread death and dismembermentThe characters of this world I recognized as Bizarro versions of their fairy tale counterparts From fauns and gremlins to the Three Bears and soldier playing cards the whole gamut of fantasyland people are coveredOf note to me was the Captain sailing on a ship of gold and scouring the seas for mermaids to sell into slavery While he shared only two chapters with this reader his role was vitally important to understanding the way this particular world spinsOne of my favorite ideas contained in this book are the hermaphroditic magicians aptly known as Wizches Self proclaimed rulers of the planet they have even gone so far as to maintain a special school used to train The Team young Wizches into future leaders They serve as the chief antagonists standing in the way of Invader 898Which brings me to the protagonist of Carnageland a character with a clearly defined goals who literally stops for nothing to achieve them If I could give out a New Bizarro Author Series award for Most Well Developed Character of 2009 it would go to Invader 898 This walking apocalypse is a Zim on acid His entire being was molded and conditioned from birth to invade invade invade 898 s faith in invasion is stronger than any Zionist jihadist and Fred Phelp s respective faiths combined and he uses this vigor to push himself forward in his uest to conuer alien worldsSuper Ego saysAt sixty seven pages long this is the shortest of the four NBAS books but it packs a lot of story into those pages The length is perfect this is a lean point A to point B to point Cetc read that never lets up from page oneThe story although in third person narrative doesn t stray from Invader 898 s point of view We experience the action and events as he sees them This does not however prevent the author from describing the world that 898 is experiencing and it stands as one of the enjoyable aspects of the story The landscapes the buildings the creatures all described beautifully and in as few words as necessary keeping up with the pace of the action while dazzling the reader with thoughts of a truly fantastic settingThere exists an extreme juxtaposition between Invader 898 and the alien world he invades This creates the main conflict in the story for the protagonist Like any good priest or politician 898 has vowed all his life to suppress his sexual tendencies And like priests and politicians he is constantly tempted by little altar boys and hookers in the form of fairy tale creatures who have turned sex into the greatest resource on their planet Ironically the planet they inhabit is made up entirely of what most other beings would consider to be of much greater value They have crystal for ground cash for leaves and oil for waterThe book alludes to several fairy tale creatures along with several fairy tales themselves From Grimm s Fairy Tales and Hans Christian Andersen to modern fantasies such as The Chronicles of Narnia and Harry Potter David W Barbee skews and sexualizes everybody s favorite children stories into Bizarro madnessThis is a modern fairy tale complete with a moral to be found hidden under the layers of carnage If Invader 898 is to completely conuer this world he must above all else conuer the last thing he ever thought he d have to himself

Download ↠ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free » David W. Barbee

Carnageland

Read & Download Carnageland ç PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free David W. Barbee » 5 Read & Download Download ↠ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free » David W. Barbee Alien invaders They want your planet they want your money and they won't stop until they have it all Invader 898 is about to embark on his first assignment but when he is sent to a backwoods planet on the far side of the univer. Jeez O Petes I m telling you Eraserhead Press has such an uncanny knack for mining new writing talent In Carnageland author David Barbee showcases his talent in a tale that kept me turning the pages and chuckling delightfully BTW have you ever seen the Reverend chuckle delightfully It s pretty Mary Don t tell anyoneThe alien invader 898 has been assigned to violently soften up Carnageland prior to the full scale invasion Carnageland is a world who s inhabitants seem to mimic all of our favorite childhood stories And not just Rapunzle and dwarves and flying monkeys from the Wizard of Oz and whatnot but also Bizarro versions of Peter Pan pirates and even ol Harry Potter and his pals898 has to slice and dice his way through these popular characters and many many others the wizches were superb 898 must rid any and all opposition to the forthcoming invasion It is 898 s first mission and he must succeed Glory and a nice little promotion are on the line 898 tackles his task with much vim vigor and splattered bits and piecesMy favorite character in Carnageland has got to be 898 s weapon of choice the DOOMSHOOTER What s so cool about this alien gun is that every foe encountered gets shot with a completely new weird and wonderfully violent means of dispatch All kinds of crazy things emerges from the business end of said Doomshooter I don t want to tell you all the awesome stuff that comes out that was a big chunk of the fun for the Reverend I don t want to take that away from you It would be a sin and awfully hypocritical of me soFor a reader as jaded as Rage this fun Bizarro tale was a breath of fresh air

characters Carnageland

Read & Download Carnageland ç PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free David W. Barbee » 5 Read & Download Download ↠ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free » David W. Barbee He temptations of the fantasy creatures For an invader victory means promotion and failure means the pink slip of death Carnageland is a perverted odyssey of sci fi and fantasy shaken and stirred so that only one may emerge ali. A cute intergalactic planetary fable I really liked 898 s rubbery green foo dog ninja alien ways especially during the action scenes with the doomshooter These are the moments that moved this book along nicely Also when reading this invasive novel you will see that some inspiration came from classic tales such as Wizard of Oz Snow White and the Seven Dwarves Humpty Dumpty and Jack in the Bean Stalk with bizarre twists and turns that gave these old favorites a fresh new spin for sure However the end was where I felt this read fell a bit short for me I mean it just kind of ended rather abruptly and I guess I was looking for something Doesn t mean you shouldn t read this one because you should but to those of you who like strong endings this one might leave you a bit unsatisfied but I ll let you make that call for yourselfAll in all I certainly enjoyed this book and I m very much looking forward to reading something else by David Barbee in the future


10 thoughts on “PDF/EPUB Carnageland

  1. says: PDF/EPUB Carnageland Download ↠ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free » David W. Barbee David W. Barbee » 5 Read & Download

    characters Carnageland PDF/EPUB Carnageland Download ↠ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free » David W. Barbee Jeez O Petes I'm telling you Eraserhead Press has such an uncanny knack for mining new writing talent In Carnageland author David Barbee showcases his talent in a tale that kept me turning the pages and chuckling delightful

  2. says: David W. Barbee » 5 Read & Download Download ↠ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free » David W. Barbee PDF/EPUB Carnageland

    David W. Barbee » 5 Read & Download PDF/EPUB Carnageland I find it highly entertaining that I read this book today by chance after watching a debate regarding Stephen Hawking's recent humans should not try to contact alien life warning last night Aliens will kill us all steal our natural resources and rape our hermaphrodites While that may not be exactly what Mr Hawking is implying David W Barbee interprets it as so in his sick twisted bizarro fairy tale CARNAGELANDThe story

  3. says: PDF/EPUB Carnageland characters Carnageland

    PDF/EPUB Carnageland Originally I was a bit iffy about Carnageland Books containing alien invaders are not really my thingI eyed it for a couple months and kept thinking HmmmmI don't know about this Luckily I was definitely super ultra wrong about my iffy ness Depriving myself of this would have been really really stupidIt's one of the most dementedly cute books

  4. says: PDF/EPUB Carnageland David W. Barbee » 5 Read & Download Download ↠ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free » David W. Barbee

    PDF/EPUB Carnageland Carnageland tells the story of Invader 898 a priapic little alien sent to a strange backwoods planet in order to prepare

  5. says: PDF/EPUB Carnageland

    PDF/EPUB Carnageland Id says3 2 1 BLAST OFF Oh shit me straight to hell the Invaders are coming Look out fairy tale creatures 898 has left his Inpire Inc piggy bank homeworld and has one and only one thing on his bulbous mind ConuestNo amount of cold hard cash growing on your crystalline trees is going to stop this fucker and his Doomshooter as it melts faces off fauns and shoots grenades into mountainous orgy piles of peopleWho's gonna stop him? Ma

  6. says: characters Carnageland PDF/EPUB Carnageland

    PDF/EPUB Carnageland This book reminds me of the x versus y fantasies my friends and I had growing up and in this case it's aliens versus the various creatures of high fantasy David W Barbee makes the compelling argument that aliens would win

  7. says: PDF/EPUB Carnageland

    PDF/EPUB Carnageland David W. Barbee » 5 Read & Download Download ↠ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free » David W. Barbee David Barbee is a National Treasure which is to say he is an action packed thriller starring Nicolas Cage In Carnageland we follow the exploits of Invader 898 as he takes over a planet of hypersexualized fantasy characters from our childhood like Rapunzel and Peter Pan And with his Doomshooter the euivalent of Green Lantern's ring nothing can stand in his way In fact the only challenge he really faces is keepin

  8. says: PDF/EPUB Carnageland David W. Barbee » 5 Read & Download Download ↠ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free » David W. Barbee

    PDF/EPUB Carnageland David W Barbee takes readers on a madcap adventure as the alien Invader 898 goes on his first mission Sent to a planet full of twisted characters of fairy tale and fable Invader 898 and his trusty Doomshooter are

  9. says: characters Carnageland PDF/EPUB Carnageland Download ↠ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free » David W. Barbee

    PDF/EPUB Carnageland A cute intergalactic planetary fable I really liked 898's rubbery green foo dog ninja alien ways especially during the ac

  10. says: PDF/EPUB Carnageland characters Carnageland

    David W. Barbee » 5 Read & Download Download ↠ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free » David W. Barbee PDF/EPUB Carnageland David W Barbee is one of the authors featured in the New Bizarro Series and I am glad I was introduced to this wonderful book It's a uick read at 67 pages but well worth it It's a freaky fun tale about 898 an alien Invader Hell bent on taking over everything From his anus shaped eyes to his trumpet prehensile shaped lowe

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